What is the magic of letting go?
In short, releasing what no longer serves us creates the room for the unpredictable magic that can only come when we have the courage to get vulnerable, to risk unbelievable growth.
NOTE: Letting go HURTS, even when we know it’s right because challenging our established identify feels like a death. It’s why most of us have been have made bold statements about things we’re TOTALLY DONE WITH, only to be caught in DMs and ice cream tubs we’ve rebuked only days (or moments) earlier.
So, knowing change is difficult, I’ve designed this ritual to hopefully help you work through thoughts and feelings that will come up as you release things, people, and patterns from your life that don’t help you feel authentic and powerful.
I happen to be filming this on the day of the Lunar Eclipse, so it’s a potent time for this kind of work. BUT this work can be done at any time, and should be used whenever you’re feeling a pressing need to create some space in your life to grow into. Throughout this process, keep this guideline in mind: be patient and compassionate with yourself.
All you need for this ritual is a timer, a pen and paper – a fire-safe container and lit candle are optional. ^__^
FIRST: Set a timer for 10 minutes. Do a brain dump of what do you want to let go of. What’s holding you back, getting in your way, or bringing you down? What thoughts, habits, people, situations, or stories make you feel low, stuck, or frustrated? Write it all out.
Please note, when I say “stories,” these stories may be true – something that happened to you that was wrong or unfair. The idea is to ask yourself, is that a story that it serves me to keep telling myself, or am I ready to release my grip on that one so that I can go on to write a new one
I’m not asking you to pretend that never happened to you, or to pretend you don’t feel that way. I am asking if identifying with this story is making your life fuller or more draining. All of us have good and bad stories – the problem comes when we identify with the stories so much that our ego attaches to them as part of, you guessed it, our identity.
For example, a story like, “I’ve had my heart broken more than once and now I don’t trust people” may be totally true for you. You may see it reflected everywhere in your life, in untrustworthy people and in the people you push away at the threat of emotional risk.
Your ego is doing its best to protect you by reminding you that you’re a person who’s too savvy or too damaged to have an authentic connection with someone. That’s just who you are, right? Well, it has been. Does it have to be? Only if that is a story you consider worth keeping, and your free will is everything!
All I want is for you to get what you want, and if your story is serving you I’d never ask you to let go of it.
Once your ten minutes is up, I suggest that you choose one habit, relationship, or circumstance to release at a time so that your intention has more focus. That said, you’re the Magician, so trust your instincts!
STEP 2: Once you’ve chosen the subject of your banishment, turn the page, literally and figuratively, and write your goodbye letter.
To really get ourselves ready to say goodbye, we’re going to do it thoroughly and gracefully, the better to embody the energy we want to experience in the external world – “As within, so without.”
You can write this digitally if you want, but the science and magic behind physically translating your thoughts into tangible form via writing is too compelling for me not to recommend doing this the old fashioned way.
To begin, write:
Dear [pattern, person, or situation],
Thank you for… stick with me here. You may be banishing something or someone totally shitty, but that situation offered you something, even if it was survival skills, a tough lesson, or an example of how not to be an asshole.
Or if it something you will really miss, truly express those heartfelt feelings you want to share. Pour your heart out.
Really feel the gratitude for whatever this person, habit, or circumstance did for you and share it. If you can, forgive this thing for not giving you what you needed, or for hurting you. Remember, you’re not forgiving it or them for their sake – you’re loving yourself by deciding you don’t need to carry this feeling around anymore.
Don’t forget to forgive yourself for anything you feel responsible for in this dynamic, whether you made mistakes, or just just for holding onto old habits and paradigms.
Once you’ve given thanks, explain why you need to let this go.
Whatever that looks like. “I’ve grown out of this, or I need to move on, or you are toxic for me, or you don’t deserve a place in my life.” This is where you remind yourself of all the ways that this thing or person doesn’t serve you growing into your best life.
After you’ve made your reasons clear, finish your letter with genuine well wishes and goodbye. Then, burn it up, let it go, and then keep letting go.
Now, the fun part, we get to dispose of our letter in whatever way feels powerful – I personally enjoy setting it on fire because of the literal transformation of energy that takes place when we do that. “As within, so without!” I recommend if you haven’t already, similarly dispose of any related memorabilia and visual triggers when you burn your letter.
The final step in my banishings is to seal them by transforming the energy we raise as we do this work. Whatever you’re feeling after having written all that out and setting it ablaze/ripping it to shreds/burying it in the cat box, you’re going to transmute and embody this energy to CREATE MORE MAGIC IN YOUR LIFE!
How are we going to do that? By dancing our asses off!
As you think about your banishment and the desired results, choose a rip roaring anthem that epitomizes why you’re doing what you’re doing, and how good it’s going to feel to be on the other side.
When you finish burning your letter, turn up the volume or pop in your headphones and really JAM OUT to this song, shamelessly. You don’t have to look cool!
The more you let yourself get into it, the more energy you transform and GENERATE. If you remember my last videos, you know how powerful it is to project your energy with intention – you’re not just doing a victory dance – you’re intentionally creating a new reality where you are liberated and LOVING LIFE!
I also recommend you continue to use this anthem as banishing “aftercare.” When you intentionally banish something or someone, you’re effectively yanking on the big cosmic pendulum – so calmly, witchily predict that it will swing back and offer itself to you temptingly, whether in life or by popping up in your mind.
Then be prepared to pause, find a moment to blast your banishing anthem, dance it out, and then ask yourself if you want this thing back in your life.
You have the choice, you have the power. Every time you remember that, it will be easier and easier to release your grip, shed your skin, and grow into your Magic.
Until next time, happy banishing!